Well greeting and salutations dear reader, it’s been awhile. I’d like to have some really good excuse for not writing more often, but let’s face it I’m not really one for excuses or apologies, so you’ll just have to suck it up princesses. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, so you’d all having to be in love with be now, right? Oh don’t be fucking shy, you were in love with me before I went AWOL on you and no I wasn’t in jail for some heinous crime but I’ll forgive you for thinking so, if you were, because it’s flattering.
Actually not it’s not, it’s a dumb as fuck because I’d have to have been caught. Tsk, tsk. You underestimate me. Though being caught wouldn’t be so bad I imagine, since I give absoloute zero fucks, in the scientific sense. That’s -273.15 degrees of fucks I don’t give. So yes, hell is literally frozen over. I’d like to give a big shout out to my expanded audience of late. Your effort at gleaning an insight into my little world has not gone unnoticed and is greatly appreciated. I love being all kinds of popular, even the bad kind. Famous, infamous, really it all tastes the same, like a piece of your soul that I own. Delish.
Now we have got the introductions and reintroductions out of the way, because it’s just a formality really and I really don’t do formalities unless I have too. Well even if I have too, I do try to try or at least I intend to, so it’s pretty much the same thing, right? Going to disagree? I still have Magnus remember, he will hunt you down and I will cut you. Fun times.
You know what pisses me off royally? Ok that’s really a leading question because there is an infinite list of answers to that question so no matter what you picked, you’d be right. But let’s focus on the now and be in the moment and talk about what’s pissed me off over the past couple of days…… I feel some people holding their breath out there, relax not everything is about you promise. The fucking feminist agenda. Now before you start calling me a traitor to my gender, hear me out on this one because I have several salient points to make about this. But to sum it up in a nutshell it’s just gone too fucking far. No I’m not saying gender equality has gone too far but I’m saying the super charged feminist agenda has gone too far. So far in fact that it’s the antithesis of feminism and actually anti-feminism, cleverly masquerading as feminism. How is that so I hear you ask? Well as sure as shit I’m about to tell you.
I am fucking sick of the Sheryl Sandberg’s and Lea Michele’s (both epic cunts in my book FYI, one look at them and I literally want to punch them in the face. It’s a visceral instinctive reaction to them that I just can’t explain and can’t give a toss to examine) telling me “even though I am a woman I CAN”…. What the living fuck, of course I can you dumb fucking twats, my genitalia has nothing to do with it. I’m sick of hearing that women need to support each other, hold hands by the campfire and sing some fucking folk song in order to progress in life and their chosen field. You know because without you doing that and reassuring me and holding my hand the entire way, I’d get lost in the woods like bloody Hansel and Gretel. Are you fucking kidding me? I can fucking read a map to start with, but beside the point.
We have these successful women, using both terms liberally, maybe it’s just easier if I say epic fucking cunts? Promoting the shit out of women’s rights and feminist agenda, of which they lead. Hello classic narcissist, how nice to see one of my own kind, well not really cause I fucking hate you. Not because you’re a narcissist but because you are soooooo concerned about the feminist position, that under all your empowerment and crap, you are actually saying that alone we cannot achieve anything. That we have to be part of your fucking pack of she wolves in order to get gender equality and to achieve anything. Oh thank fuck you found me, where would I be without you?
Oh in the same fucking place I am now but with the knowledge I can get here without encouraging pats on the shoulder, pushes from other people and I don’t know having a fucking backbone and the initiative to achieve all without your backhanded support. What you are really saying, is if we don’t rally together as a gender and “fight the man” or “break the glass ceiling” then it can’t be done. Oh for the love of god, I smashed that glass ceiling years ago, with my bare hands and alone. I didn’t need you to prop me up on your shoulder or fly on the wings of your coattails and tell me how to do it. I just fucking did it! You know why and how? Because unlike you I don’t see my gender as a hindrance, in some cases it’s an advantage because looking dumb and being underestimated is a secret weapon in my huge arsenal of tools that I use to sink stupid people. If you’re dumb enough to judge the proverbial book by its cover, without even reading the blurb (or in my case the warning label) then more fool you and the greater your fall will be. I DON’T need you to tell me I’m worthy, I DON’T need you to tell me I CAN or I’m worth it. I fucking know this already. Have for years, it’s not fucking 1970 anymore and the bra burning days of the underappreciated housewife are long and truly gone. If you look around there are plenty of industry leaders who are female, or did you miss that chapter in “how to make a quick buck off women with low self esteem”?
So what are you really doing? Putting back into place antiquated ideas, making that glass ceiling appear shatter proof and basically telling me that without the support of your sycophants I actually CAN’T. Oh for fucks sake, for shame. Do you really think that women SHOULD be promoted, appointed or given privileges based on their gender alone? Even parliaments are moving in this direction, by x year we hope to achieve x number of women in parliament. Well you’ll excuse me while I fucking disagree with that sentiment and say I DON’T want a fucking woman in a job just because she lacks a penis, I want a woman in that job because she is the best person for it, or a man. In my book the BEST PERSON FOR THE JOB is the one that should get the job, fuck quotas and all other shit that make us charity cases. Oh you poor dear, you have a vagina…. What a disability to live with, in compensation I’ll hand you this job. No you don’t have to be the most qualified person for it, the best person to do it or even able to do it proficiently, but we will give you the vagina exemption.
Yeah you can shove that up your ass till kingdom come thanks. FUCKING EARN IT! It really is that simple. You have the same educational opportunities as men (I will add in here that I am all for quota’s when it comes to tertiary education, based solely on the fact not everyone has the same educational opportunities if they come from a background of poverty but that’s based on socioeconomics not the vagina to penis ratio), you have the same ability for tenacity as men, hell I’d argue more in most cases. Men tend to forget transgressions easily but as women we are bitches and we hold every transgression in our memory vault till we die and likely beyond because we are vindictive creatures who will pull it out at any point in order to illustrate a point or win an argument. I can remember shitty things MrBmB (yeah I’m still married and you can say it with me again “poor bastard’) has done/said from over a decade ago in order to prove a point. Him? He’s lucky if he remembers what he ate for dinner last night.
So you’ll excuse me if I don’t bed over to welcome that shit you’re trying to shovel up my ass. Though kudos to you for preying on the perceived weak and by saying you’re empowering them, your actually stripping them of any power that they might have, their self worth and lining your greedy little pockets with their money. Or is it their husband’s money? You know since women are all pathetic little creatures that without your help are destined for a life of mediocrity and being second class citizens. Hey I don’t believe that bullshit, but that’s what your selling isn’t it?
Without you I’d be nothing, nobody, with unfulfilled dreams and living a shell of a life. What a fucking laugh you cunts, really? Let me tell you if I were hired for a job based on my merits and I found out a male counterpart with equal skills was being paid more, you know what? I’d have ZERO issue demanding the situation be rectified, hauling you up against some tribunal of sorts and fucking flailing you alive and enjoying every damn minute of it. Because even if I’m just a woman, I’m really not to be fucked with. Just a woman, oh dear god I want to laugh so hard I could cry. There is no ‘just’ about it, I am a woman and it’s that simple. It has zero to do with my skill set, my employability, my wage earning capacity or the way I live my fucking life. Well ok yeah it may impact on how I live my life, cause it means I get to buy lots of shiny shit like diamonds, designer handbags and when the need comes, sink stupid assholes who see it as a disability. Cause as sure as the sun doth shine, it really is an advantage to be underestimated. Well as long as you stick around long enough to show them the folly of the situation. That really is the fun part.
So my final words on this topic is women are bitches, we agree right? Feminism has become anti-feminism by its backhanded delivery and cunts like Sandberg and Michele epic cunts can go hunt down the mongoose to fuck. I am not getting on their train and insisting that women be told they are worth something. If they can’t figure that out for themselves, then fuck them really. What they don’t need is for these cunts to be telling them they need to be told to believe in themselves, that they need a pack behind them to push them, catch them if they fall or to break a glass ceiling and achieve. They haven’t developed any self-confidence really because it’s reliant on the opinion’s and actions of others, they don’t have a backbone because they haven’t had to grow one and they sure as shit haven’t learned all the important lessons you learn when you claw your way to the top, man or women, that means they will be a lasting success. The point of the matter is if they need to be told these things, how fucking effective are they going to be once they reach the other side? You can’t work effectively if you have someone holding your hand all the time, reassuring you can because you think you can’t (can you really?) or the intestinal fortitude to stand alone and be counted when the time will come. Do we really want people questioning whether we have earned out position or that we merely are just another victim of the vagina quota?
Im also sure there is a good Vagina Monologs joke that could be made in here somewhere, but since I haven’t seen the play the only noise I know for a fact a vagina makes is a queef….. Oh and whatever Ms Michele’s sounds like when she’s dressed like a whore on speed with the wind blowing up her dress.